The Event – Regrets

Wow, a person shouldn’t spend time reflecting on what ~ if anything ~ one regrets in life. However, admission to regrets may be a releasing exercise of the mind. I think everyone ponders on things  they would have done differently. But life moves forward, not backward, and we cannot undo the past, but we can live faithfully and fruitfully in the present.

I have no big regrets. In previous entries, I acknowledge how undeservingly blessed I am ~ now and in the past, and there isn’t much I would do differently. The list below is a bit frivolous, but these are the things that come to mind when I think “I wish I would have. . . .”, in no particular order.

1. I wish I would have bought my children new pillows ~ new, really nice pillows.

2. I wish I would have pursued my first career choice of court reporting, at the same college where Tim and I met.  It wouldn’t have changed my life, but it would have given me a very flexible and alternative option of great income while working from home, which would be great right now in my life.

3. I wish I would have talked to my Dad more about his faith and shared my Jesus with him. Where is he today?

4. I wish I would have pursued my dream and interest in ventriloquism years ago so I could have been enjoying it all these many years, building it into a ministry tool, and a fun, flexible business as well.

5. I wish I would have insisted on sending my girls to church camp when they were young. We lived on a farm in Bayard, and Tim had a mindset that summer camps were for city/town kids, not farm kids. Some of my most fun memories were from church camp which I went to every summer for about seven years. Yes, I was a town kid. When we moved off the farm to town for three years, Cash got to go to church camp. Camp is among some of his fun memories.

6. I wish I would have attended my brother’s wedding (Vern and Melinda). Again, we were farming. Farmers didn’t travel far away in the summer time, and flying wasn’t in our budget or as easy and prevalent as it is in our lives today.

7. I wish I would have let Alexis take dance lessons when she was a child. My mindset at that time was similar to Tim’s mindset about summer camp.

8. I wish I would have kept a journal throughout my married life. It’s something I have always wanted to do, but never took the time to do it. My Grandpa Gallwas wrote a sentence or two everyday in a big bound legal-looking journal ~ maybe it was just the price of eggs he sold that day, or the weather, but it was his daily journaling. Reading his daily log in the past was/is my inspiration to document as well. The journal was passed to my Uncle Fred.  Today, blogging makes it so easy to keep a journal documented with pictures. I guess that’s why I take this opportunity to reflect a lot on my past as well as my present. I wish I would have started sooner so as not to have lost memory of so many little, but important moments of life.

9. I wish I hadn’t given away my childhood “Roberta” bride doll that I got for Christmas when I was about eight (?). I remember wanting a bride doll for a long time. When I got one for Christmas, I spent a week staying with my Aunt Bertha out on the farm the following summer, and she and my older cousin Evelyn sewed lots ~ I mean lots ~ of clothes for my bride doll. Roberta was about two feet tall, and I’m sure my doll was the best dressed doll ever. I gave it all away when I was in FHA in high school and we were doing a toy drive for the underprivileged. I felt really good at the time because I obviously never played with it anymore, and it was a wonderful gift to some young girl who would love it! It was when I had little girls of my own that I wished I had “Roberta” and her wardrobe to give to my girls.  (silly, isn't it!)

10. I wish I would have let the children linger longer feeding the pigeons in the French Quarter Square in New Orleans in December 1981 instead of hurrying them along so we could see more stuff.

So there’s my list. I could probably add to it if I racked my brain. But that’s not what this is about ~ thinking hard to remember something. These are thoughts that quickly surface in my memory when wishing I would have. . .  .   These are eventful memories ~ events that I could have handled differently to enrich my life or the lives of my children without altering my life’s journey.

My life is an event to be cherished, an event to be thankful for, a blessed journey! I lead a simple, uncomplicated life.   I love my life and all that it has been, is, and will be!  I want my life to glorify God, but I fall short.  I need to work on that.